My Single Change That Worked: How I Overcame After-Work Tension Through an Unexpected Find in the Attic

I frequently become like a coiled spring after work. Tension grips my shoulders, breathing becomes rapid and shallow. Usually, closing my laptop with a thud used to lead to the squeak of a cork pulled from a bottle of red, the wine hastily sploshed into a glass, that first mouthful putting a much-needed full stop on the working day.

Later, a few months ago, I discovered my now-adult son’s old school recorder up in the loft. I idly blew into it, instantly reminded of the time when it drove me crazy – his daily practice a violent assault on my eardrums, the piercing shriek still reverberating through my head hours after he had gone to bed.

But rather than consigning it to the bin, I brought it downstairs, together with a beginner’s songbook. Growing up, I was the least musical child ever. I’d had recorder lessons at infant school, yet never got to try other instruments.

Googling “how to play the recorder”, I watched dozens of YouTube videos aimed at children, and got a fingering guide on paper. Looking up simple recorder songs, I felt excited when I played a recognizable Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. Admittedly, it was something your average five-year-old could master before first break, but as a tone deaf, impatient and stressed 51-year-old, it felt like a huge achievement.

My son questioned my actions (and please could I stop), but I persevered – I enjoyed the sensation the recorder gave me. Forgetting notes easily forced me to focus on the music sheet, and carefully mimic the finger placements. My breathing slowed down, I was focused, and once I’d mastered that first faltering tune, I was overjoyed. I could play an instrument.

Now, after some months, I can “play” other nursery rhymes and a decent Ode to Joy. Yes, my timing is rubbish, and I still need to write the names of the notes down, but to me, it’s not about being skilled or a “musician” – it is simply about the pleasure it brings and the fact I can’t think of anything else when I am playing.

I read that only one in six children learn to play the recorder now, which probably relieves parents, yet it made me wistful for my school years, and my son’s childhood.

I make it a habit to play each night after work as my first activity, and during those 20 minutes, I escape into my own realm. Afterward, I feel totally energised and uplifted.

My friends think it’s hilarious, yet a therapist friend informed me I was not only lowering my stress levels, but improving my cognitive skills, like memory and sound processing, which is invaluable at my time of life. For daily wellness, it’s truly an ode to joy.